Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

Back from Florida

I am happy to say that I am home! I have been for about a week now, but I haven't had enough energy to sit in front of the computer and try to put together something interesting for you all. Florida was fun, a bit chilly, but way better than the below zero temperatures home, here in Illinois. Before leaving for Florida everyone insisted on informing me that "it's going to be cold down there". Now, why would you not just want to be happy for someone going on a vacation? Why would you want to try and convince someone that they are going to have a terrible time? I just kept saying "warmer than here!" and called them jealous under my breath. Despite all the comments about the weather I had a great time sleeping in every morning and taking my time getting around and not having to worry about anything except what I was going to eat that day for a whole entire week! It was in the 50s during the day at the beginning of the trip and gradually warmed up through ...

Two of a kind

Like my pregnancy with Darcy, I do not have any morning sickness. It's actually the opposite. If I don't eat, I get nauseated and I get a headache. I won't feel like eating, but I force myself to cause I know it will make me feel better. So, I just eat often to prevent that from happening! I do consider myself pretty lucky in that aspect. If it wasn't for the positive pregnancy test and all the appointments I'm going to I wouldn't know I was pregnant. Oh yeah, and the constant trips to the bathroom. How could I forget those? I'm craving sub sandwiches . Turkey and cheese subs with lettuce and mayo is what I'm usually asking for. Unfortunately, I am craving sweets. Halloween was a killer. I ate way too much candy! Darcy didn't like sweets. I never craved them with her. I so wish I could turn away sugar now. But, I've been able to control myself a little more...even though I just devoured fried ice cream from the Mexican restaurant in town. Bad m...

Eight hours

Here I sit 8 hours before my open heart surgery. I've waited to write another post since I've been having multiple emotions over the past week or so. I've cycled through fear, excitement, hope, uneasiness, and anxiousness, just to name a few. I've even wanted to call all my doctors and tell them I've changed my mind, I can't go through with it. Then I remind myself that this has to be done, I'll have to go through it at some point in my life, might as well be now when I am healthy and strong. I expected to be a mess today. Even though I feel like I've gone through today with a deer in the headlights look, I am pretty content, at ease. Elliot only spent about an hour and a half at daycare today while I did my pre-op testing. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with her since she won't get to see me while I'm in the ICU. I've talked to her as much as I can about mommy staying in the hospital. I've tried to get her excited about diff...

The little time we have...

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