Skip to main content

Eight hours

Here I sit 8 hours before my open heart surgery. I've waited to write another post since I've been having multiple emotions over the past week or so. I've cycled through fear, excitement, hope, uneasiness, and anxiousness, just to name a few. I've even wanted to call all my doctors and tell them I've changed my mind, I can't go through with it. Then I remind myself that this has to be done, I'll have to go through it at some point in my life, might as well be now when I am healthy and strong.

I expected to be a mess today. Even though I feel like I've gone through today with a deer in the headlights look, I am pretty content, at ease. Elliot only spent about an hour and a half at daycare today while I did my pre-op testing. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with her since she won't get to see me while I'm in the ICU. I've talked to her as much as I can about mommy staying in the hospital. I've tried to get her excited about different family members coming in town over the next week and she's handled the information pretty well. She's been playing doctor a lot, using me as the patient, so when I come home I know I'll have an excellent caregiver.

I don't know really what to expect. I'm just so ready to get it over with. Ready to start healing. Ready to get things back to normal as soon as possible.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

OMG!!!

All the blogs I follow are gone! Am I the only one having this problem? I hope it's just a mistake and they will all be back! YIKES!
1 comment
Read more

Ending the first week

As I am ending the first week of my 2 week challenge I am pumped and already looking forward to my next one.  It's so exciting to see others getting involved and sharing their journey with each other.  Not only are they keeping themselves accountable, but it helps me stay on track and they are keeping me accountable.  I feel like it's my job as a coach to be up before everyone and posting that post that they will for see first in the morning.  Their coach got up and worked out already and that I hope is inspiring. This next challenge will be on my own.  As in my coach won't be there to guide me through, I'll be leading it myself.  Along side my new coach that I signed on earlier this week.  I already see my team forming and it's encouraging me to work harder and reach more people. I'm currently doing 21 Day Fix and loving it!  It's 30 minute workouts that I knock out easy before work each day.  It is 7 days a week, but that's simple to do...
Post a Comment
Read more

TGIF

Thank goodness it is Friday! I was so happy when I woke up this morning and remembered that today is Friday. Payday at that! I don't know why payday excites me, as all the money goes to some sort of bill! But, I'm thankful that I can pay them. This weekend is exciting though because I can enjoy it without being sick! Plus I get to go to lunch with my dear friend who I love having lunch with because we can relate to a lot of the same things. Guess that is why we are friends! As the week comes to a close I like to reflect on what has happened during last 5 days. It's crazy how so many ups and downs occur in such a small time frame. No major occurrences (thank goodness) but, one that make you stop and think where you are. This week I discovered that one of my co-workers in my department is expecting. I still don't know why I have the feelings that I do.I should be happy for the ones around me, but I still feel some sort of jealousy. I want so bad to feel excited and happy ...
1 comment
Read more